Hannah vs Hannah 25

“If you don’t write

Every. Single. Day.

You will fail”

My mind says. As I try to fall asleep on the pillow I will be rising from hours before the sun kisses the horizon.

Then that part of my mind says under her breath

“don’t say I didn’t tell you so.”

before she turns and retreats into white space.

So

I drag my bedraggled head off of the pillows that still smell like the boy I miss, out from between the freshly laundered down duvet, and to the end of my bed where I take up my phone — and in the darkness I lay a track for my night of dreams — and tell an audience of my mom the last five minutes of my day.

Maybe now I will succeed

Maybe now I will sleep.

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