oh mother let’s go down

down in the river to pray

Soo, July… july, really late july. I am sitting beside the Lance Corporal, who has just gotten his final wisdom tooth taken out today… they took it out with him awake. Appaling? I know. I thought so too. He says he felt and heard everything. He’s so hardcore he didn’t even mention it until he got home? I could never hold that sort of trauma in for more than ten minutes… He’s amazing.

The upside of this surgery is that we get wednesday and thursday off for health-rest, and my sweet little coffee shop has been super understanding and allowed me to take the days off to take care of him, so this week we’re working monday, tuesday, and friday… epic. Best part is, besides all of the extra quality time and me feeling like a useful little bird bringing jello and soft things to him, is that we have an excellent source of hours of entertainment in the season 3 of “Seinfeld” I purchased as a get well surprise, and in our netflix account which has been offering us endless delight as we are working our way through “the Office” we’re on season 4… and yeah… it’s as good as they say.

On the thoughtful side;

I’ve been reliving my learning of beauty again since the summer has begun. I am two weeks away from my one year anniversary with the Lance Corporal, and I’ll be honest with you, I am praying that our second year is made up of more simplistic beauty than that of our first year. The first year of our marriage was that terrible beauty… if that makes sense. The kind that you know is gorgeous, even though you don’t want to see it. Beautiful like a heart’s or a wing’s last few beats as it falls, or like autumn a gorgeous mantra of colors and endings. hurting, early, restless, endings. I wouldn’t take it away, I wouldn’t lose what I’ve learned from it… what we’ve learned from it. But I hope this coming year is full of a lot more life and beginnings, and colors. if at first we got rid of all of our endings, perhaps we have a life of beginnings in store. Simple beauty… like cool breezy walks… or whatever it is newly married people do when they haven’t just lost their wisdom teeth and they aren’t watching the office.

Actually… that’s a question I’d like to ask… besides some obvious “newlywed” notions… if you’re married… what did you do as newlyweds, what was your thing? Did you run together? Cook together? Or just veg out for hours upon hours of hilarity and Michael Scott? It’s a personal question, so you don’t have to answer… but if you’d like to… I’d like to know. We’re kind of newlyweds… I guess… but we sort of exist in an 8-years-in stage out here in California — if that makes any sense to you at all. So tell me, what’s it like to be just married and three months in? or four… or 11 and have had all of that together… when you’ve lived together for 11 months, do you still feel just married? I couldn’t tell you until February haha. And I guess we’re the crazy ones for that.

Anyway, real-world — and until next time
I am so crazy about this swollen man beside me.
and I am simply,

oh. I wanted to say here that I miss my family. my big sister sent me cookies and a beautiful handmade bag yesterday, my second youngest little sister decided that she, too, was a bird and has titled herself “owl”, my youngest sis is playing at open mics and competitions on her uke, and my irish twin sister has been accepted into an extremely competitive nursing school (at the school of her dreams), my big brother started his own business… and I just couldn’t be prouder of these people who have never let me go out of their love — all of my life, no matter where I went– they never ever let me out of sight or mind.
I miss farmers markets with my daddy and his piano
I miss tea and coffee and literature  with my mom and her cinnamon rolls.
The trouble with leaving pieces of you wherever you go… is that soon you get older and you miss everywhere.
A wise man and martyr once said “wherever you are, be all there” and I am working to be good at it. But I miss my S-word (sword) family.

So many more (the Lance Corporal and I are from huge families and I miss his severely as well, they have grown to be as much mine as his throughout this crazy year I can’t wait for the holiday season to be with them again)

Beauty is a word only you can define.
Sparrow. (otra vez)



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2 responses to “oh mother let’s go down

  1. I miss you, sweet sister! Love you so!

  2. Becs

    When I got my wisdom teeth out, I was awake…well, I woke up just after they started. The doctor was nice though, and kept talking to me the whole time. Who knew redheads require extra anesthesia? I love you very much.
    Love, Bex

    P.S….I need to read the whole post now. I’ve developed the worlds shortest attention span.

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